RCCG Sunday School TEACHER’s Manual 8 March 2020 Lesson 28 – Handling Marital Delay
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TOPIC: Handling Marital Delay
OPENING PRAYER: My father, please give the right spouses to your children and children to spouses in Jesus name. (Scroll down for RCCG Sunday School 8 March 2020 HYMN)
MEMORY VERSE: “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.” – Proverbs 18:22
BIBLE PASSAGE: Genesis 29:15-21 KJV (RCCG Sunday School TEACHER’s Manual 8 March 2020)
15 And Laban said unto Jacob, Because thou art my brother, shouldest thou therefore serve me for nought? tell me, what shall thy wages be?
16 And Laban had two daughters: the name of the elder was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel.
17 Leah was tender eyed; but Rachel was beautiful and well favoured.
18 And Jacob loved Rachel; and said, I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter.
19 And Laban said, It is better that I give her to thee, than that I should give her to another man: abide with me.
20 And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.
21 And Jacob said unto Laban, Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in unto her.
INTRODUCTION:
Marriage is an institution ordained by God since the creation of man (Gen. 2:18). The divine order is that man should not be alone and that no one should lack his/her mate (Isaiah 34:16). Marital delay is, therefore, a situation whereby someone who is ‘due’ or ‘ready’ to marry is not yet married as a result of circumstances, sometimes, beyond his/her control. It should be noted, however, that anyone who chooses not to marry for ‘genuine’ reasons may not be in error (Matthew 19:12, 1Corinthians 7:7-8). Marital delay is a global phenomenon that gives parents, pastors, relatives, church members, marriage counsellors and the society at large serious concern. Hence, as believers, it is important to learn how to manage such a situation.
TEXT REVIEW: GENESIS 29:15-21
Now Jacob loved Rachel; so he said, “I will serve you seven years for Rachel your younger daughter.” And Laban said, “[It is] better that I give her to you than that I should give her to another man. Stay with me.” Laban conceded to the proposal of Jacob to serve him for seven years. Gen. 29:18-19
However, soon after the expiration of the service year, the agreement was breached the service year was extended Gen. 29:27
ACTIVITY: Teachers should identify and discuss (at prep) the underlying factors behind this delay (extension) according to the Bible passage.
OUTLINES:
- LIKELY CAUSES OF MARITAL DELAY
- WHAT TO DO WHILE YOU WAIT
1. LIKELY CAUSES OF MARITAL DELAY
A. Teacher should first allow the students to mention how the following issues/behaviour can cause marital delay
i. CHARACTER DEFECT
ii. HIGH MINDEDNESS
iii. EXCESSIVE CAREER FOCUS
iv. EMOTIONAL TRAUMA
v. RACIAL/TRIBAL SENTIMENTS
vi. DELAY IN OTHER OF LIFE ACHIEVEMENT
vii. DEMONIC INFLUENCE OR GENERATIONAL CURSE
B. After the teacher has listened to the students’ comments, teacher should explain the seven identified factors as presented below:
i. CHARACTER DEFECT: Such as anger, malice, laziness, dirtiness, inferiority/superiority complex, overbearing, stubbornness, pride, etc. May repel prospective partners from someone due for marriage (Proverbs 21:9,19, Eccl. 10:1, 2Corinthians 10:12, Proverbs 16:18).
ii. HIGH MINDEDNESS: Waiting for or insisting on marrying a partner of high educational status, high standard of living, and high paying job in a reputation organization, wealthy family background, and top position in office or society, high level of spirituality, tall and heavily built, physically beautiful etc. Although, these qualities are good and desirable, such personalities may not be easily found (Phil. 2:3).
iii. EXCESSIVE CAREER FOCUS: Excessive focus on one’s career or business at the expense of preparation for marital relationship sometimes leads to delay in getting married (Eccl. 1:3-4).
iv. EMOTIONAL TRAUMA: Past experiences of failed relationships, sexual abuses, disappointment, domestic violence, parental/guardian misconduct, etc. usually constitute emotional imbalance for the victim and may lead to marital delay (Isaiah 43:18, Psalm 147:3)
v. RACIAL/TRIBAL SENTIMENTS: Most people who practice this are sometimes compelled or supported by their parents who insist they only get married to people from a particular race or tribe (Romans 10:12, Galatians 3:28).
vi. DELAY IN OTHER OF LIFE ACHIEVEMENT: Experience of delay in other spheres of life like educational pursuit, employment, financial stability etc, may be stumbling blocks to timely marriage (Psalm 90:14)
vii. DEMONIC INFLUENCE OR GENERATIONAL CURSE: Like in the case of Daniel’s petition, some marital delays are as a result of demonic influence (Daniel 10:12-13). Others may experience marital delay due to unbroken generational covenants or curses.
CLASS ACTIVITY 1: Mention any ten factors that can bring about marital delay
2. WHAT TO DO WHILE YOU WAIT
i. Hold on to God’s promises (Hebrews 10:36)
ii. Be self-descipline and avoid unnecessary hang-out with opposite sex (1Corinthians 6:12).
iii. Be humble and define your relationship with the opposite sex, beware of exploiters (Prov. 6:3, Proverbs 12:26).
iv. Refine flawed character by crying out to the Holy Spirit to help and live by the Holy Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23).
v. Be positive and maintain right balance in faith that God will do it (Jeremiah 32:27).
vi. Pay good attention to your health, physical appearance and mannerism (S.Sol 2:14, 5:15,)
vii. Be responsible in your affairs (Psalm 112:5)
viii. Pray against the forces of delay and (demonic influence) (1Corinthians 4:10).
CLASS ACTIVITY 2: Why is prayer very important to those experiencing marital delay?
SUMMARY
i. Marital delay can be cause by demonic influence, racial/tribal sentiment, emotional trauma, high mindedness etc.
ii. There is hope for those experiencing marital delay if they can hold on to God and take necessary correction where flaws are identify
CONCLUSION:
Where God the Father is present delay factor must leave
CLOSING PRAYER:
Father, please break chains of delay over all your children
ASSIGNMENT:
Give five biblical examples of people who experience marital delay in the Bible. 10marks
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RCCG Sunday School HYMN
- O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
O how I love Thee well,
I am happy, it makes me glad
To rejoice at Thy birth. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day, Thy friendship suits me well,
Both young and old will sing Thy song,
We long for Sunday School. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
Christ was Thy first teacher,
The Holy Spirit, great teacher,
Does manifest in thee. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
This testimony is sure,
That God, the Father Almighty,
Poured His blessing on Thee. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
Though the sun be so bright,
Or if the clouds black with rain,
I’ll be in Sunday School. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
I rejoice to see Thee,
Will thou pass over me today?
Without my being blest?
